Hey ya'll,
I have it. I have discovered the fountain of youth. It's not a fountain. Actually, it has nothing to do with youth either. It's the secret to longevity.
I visited my Aunt Frances today in Sheboygan, WI. She is 102. That's one hundred and two years old. She is not senile in any way shape or form. She finally got her first walker this May.
The secret:
Exercise. She does it every morning when she wakes up.
Eat what tastes good.
Keep making new friends. As you get older, make friends with younger people. Otherwise all your friends will have died and you will be alone.
24 November, 2005
07 November, 2005
I'm a problem-solver
On November 6, pirates attacked a cruise ship off the coast of Somalia. The pirates opened fire on the ship with RPGs and AKs but they couldn't board the ship. The captain, who has my upmost respect, attempted to ram one of the small pirate vessels, but missed. He then steered the cruise ship safely out to sea.
Here's the news story.
In response to this attack, cruise line officials are discussing ways to beef up security in pirate-infested waters, such as sending more US and UN warships to patrol.
When we saw this on the news, my dad and I came up with a way to solve the pirate problem cheaply, entertainingly, and painfully(to the pirates, that is).
Everyone has heard how the cowboys used to travel across the west on trains, shooting precious bison out the windows as they went. The herds of bison were reduced drastically. Cruise lines should do the same: offer passengers the opportunity to rent a high-powered rifle and use the pirates as moving targets. It would be fun because the pirates were in inflatable boats, so after one hit they would slow down and start to sink. Then the cruise ship passengers could watch them dance around in a sinking boat, simultaneously trying to bail out with their khat bags and dodge bullets. Better yet, the crew could mount remote controlled machine guns to the side of the cruise ship. Then they just unplug the X-Box in the lounge and introduce the kids to the best game system in the world.
Here's the news story.
In response to this attack, cruise line officials are discussing ways to beef up security in pirate-infested waters, such as sending more US and UN warships to patrol.
When we saw this on the news, my dad and I came up with a way to solve the pirate problem cheaply, entertainingly, and painfully(to the pirates, that is).
Everyone has heard how the cowboys used to travel across the west on trains, shooting precious bison out the windows as they went. The herds of bison were reduced drastically. Cruise lines should do the same: offer passengers the opportunity to rent a high-powered rifle and use the pirates as moving targets. It would be fun because the pirates were in inflatable boats, so after one hit they would slow down and start to sink. Then the cruise ship passengers could watch them dance around in a sinking boat, simultaneously trying to bail out with their khat bags and dodge bullets. Better yet, the crew could mount remote controlled machine guns to the side of the cruise ship. Then they just unplug the X-Box in the lounge and introduce the kids to the best game system in the world.
01 November, 2005
BACK
Its been awhile since I've posted so I thought I'd better. If you read this, comment so I know that I have readers. This is an old article about abortion. Comments, kudos, dittos, vicious arguments/insults appreciated. Read:
Zac Swedberg
17 January, 2005
Abortion
The argument over abortion stems from several questions.
1. “When does human life begin?
The definite answer to this question is humanly unattainable. There are three possible answers: at birth, at some point in the womb, or at conception.
Birth was a sufficient answer until recent years. Medical science and technology have made it possible to peer into the womb and examine (or destroy) an unborn baby without risk of killing the mother. That same science also makes the first answer insufficient, as we can observe the exact same attributes in unborn babies as in babies outside the womb. Birth itself seems simply to be a change in surroundings, not a reception of humanity.
Over the years, several laws have been made specifying times after which an abortion is illegal, based on an idea that humanity is attained at some point in the womb. Humanity obviously exists in the womb, as babies in the womb have been shown to display similar reactions to outside stimuli as babies after birth. They react to music and their mother'’s voice. During surgery, one unborn child hugged the doctor'’s finger. Creating a law of this sort depends on all babies developing at the same rate. They don'’t. As each child is an individual, each has an individual set of genes and a unique womb to develop in, making growth rate possibilities endless. Therefore no time can be specified that would serve as the attainment of humanity for all children.
Conception is the safest answer. Conception is the beginning of the human growth progress. It is the time when genetic uniqueness is established. Morally, conception is the best answer, as the other two answers are indefinite and leave room for mistakes. Absolute surety is a necessity in the abortion issue; after all, human lives are at stake.
2. “What control does a woman have over her body?”
The feminist movement commonly states that unrestricted abortion is one of a woman'’s reproductive rights. They argue that because a woman owns her body, she should be allowed to terminate whatever is living inside it. I will agree to this on the two following conditions:
A.) I am allowed to abuse and kill my dog because it lives in my house.
B.) I am allowed to vacuum the brains out of any future passengers in my car.
Of course, I am just kidding, but their logic is atrocious. A right allowing one to take the rights of others is not included in any rights of ownership (the right to life is established in the U.S. founding documents).
3. What is justifiable homicide in reference to abortions?”
Before making any exclusive rulings dealing with abortion, there are a few "“what if"”s that must be examined.
“ What if the child is the product of rape?:”
Republicans such as President George W. Bush and radio talk show host Sean Hannity believe that abortion is moral in cases of rape. Pregnancy through rape is an awful situation for a woman to experience, but it cannot justify abortion. The child produced by the rape should not be treated as if he is the perpetrator. His father committed the crime. No one should be punished for another'’s crime, least of all an innocent child.
What if the mother'’s life is at stake, and can only be saved by terminating her pregnancy?”:
This question is impossible to answer by anyone but the mother mentioned, as only she can really understand the decision she is forced into making. Fortunately, the situation is also extremely rare. It must be taken on a case by case basis, as an abortion in this situation could be considered self-defense.
Conclusion:
No argument can be made in favor of murder. At the same time, no significant argument can be made supporting the conclusion that human life begins at birth, or at any time in the womb. Therefore the only safe point of view for a society which claims any moral or virtue is a firm stance in opposition to abortion.
Zac Swedberg
17 January, 2005
Abortion
The argument over abortion stems from several questions.
1. “When does human life begin?
The definite answer to this question is humanly unattainable. There are three possible answers: at birth, at some point in the womb, or at conception.
Birth was a sufficient answer until recent years. Medical science and technology have made it possible to peer into the womb and examine (or destroy) an unborn baby without risk of killing the mother. That same science also makes the first answer insufficient, as we can observe the exact same attributes in unborn babies as in babies outside the womb. Birth itself seems simply to be a change in surroundings, not a reception of humanity.
Over the years, several laws have been made specifying times after which an abortion is illegal, based on an idea that humanity is attained at some point in the womb. Humanity obviously exists in the womb, as babies in the womb have been shown to display similar reactions to outside stimuli as babies after birth. They react to music and their mother'’s voice. During surgery, one unborn child hugged the doctor'’s finger. Creating a law of this sort depends on all babies developing at the same rate. They don'’t. As each child is an individual, each has an individual set of genes and a unique womb to develop in, making growth rate possibilities endless. Therefore no time can be specified that would serve as the attainment of humanity for all children.
Conception is the safest answer. Conception is the beginning of the human growth progress. It is the time when genetic uniqueness is established. Morally, conception is the best answer, as the other two answers are indefinite and leave room for mistakes. Absolute surety is a necessity in the abortion issue; after all, human lives are at stake.
2. “What control does a woman have over her body?”
The feminist movement commonly states that unrestricted abortion is one of a woman'’s reproductive rights. They argue that because a woman owns her body, she should be allowed to terminate whatever is living inside it. I will agree to this on the two following conditions:
A.) I am allowed to abuse and kill my dog because it lives in my house.
B.) I am allowed to vacuum the brains out of any future passengers in my car.
Of course, I am just kidding, but their logic is atrocious. A right allowing one to take the rights of others is not included in any rights of ownership (the right to life is established in the U.S. founding documents).
3. What is justifiable homicide in reference to abortions?”
Before making any exclusive rulings dealing with abortion, there are a few "“what if"”s that must be examined.
“ What if the child is the product of rape?:”
Republicans such as President George W. Bush and radio talk show host Sean Hannity believe that abortion is moral in cases of rape. Pregnancy through rape is an awful situation for a woman to experience, but it cannot justify abortion. The child produced by the rape should not be treated as if he is the perpetrator. His father committed the crime. No one should be punished for another'’s crime, least of all an innocent child.
What if the mother'’s life is at stake, and can only be saved by terminating her pregnancy?”:
This question is impossible to answer by anyone but the mother mentioned, as only she can really understand the decision she is forced into making. Fortunately, the situation is also extremely rare. It must be taken on a case by case basis, as an abortion in this situation could be considered self-defense.
Conclusion:
No argument can be made in favor of murder. At the same time, no significant argument can be made supporting the conclusion that human life begins at birth, or at any time in the womb. Therefore the only safe point of view for a society which claims any moral or virtue is a firm stance in opposition to abortion.
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